Why Me?

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I was able to  have the most fun filled weekend with my mom and two of my little sisters. They are all such good friends to me. They came down on Friday night and we spent all day Saturday going out to eat, shopping, at the beach and being spiritually uplifted.

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Usually my Saturdays are just like my other weekdays because Derek still studies so this one was a real treat! When Derek and I decided to come to medical school in Florida, I was excited to live near my family but also hadn’t lived close to home in a few years so I just thought it was a nice bonus to many of the other reasons we chose this school but now I think even though we didn’t know it at the time, being close to my family has been a HUGE blessing for us. So, thanks mom and dad and all of my siblings for loving us and letting us take over your house when we come to visit!

IMG_9646One of the things we were able to do as mom and sisters was to watch a worldwide conference for women. Here are a couple of my favorite quotes from those inspirational talks, which can be viewed in their entirety here!

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Sometimes I think your ears hear things and then there are times when your heart hears things or rather feels things. These quotes above are some of the things that my ears heard but my heart throughout the conference was feeling heavy. Not in a bad way but in a why me? sort of way. I feel like I have so many blessings, I have a wonderful husband and a smiling healthy baby, a place to live and food to eat, a wonderful family and loving and caring extended families on both sides, and I live in a great country where I enjoy so many freedoms. But I got to thinking, why am I blessed with all of this? What made me qualify for this? I feel so sad when I hear of friends who want children so badly but for some reason, they aren’t able to or I see people who don’t have a place to live or food to eat or people in other countries who don’t enjoy any freedoms and I wish that I could give them what they need. I know that we all have a purpose here in this life and that it will all make sense one day. In the conference one woman spoke about how one day when we die we will look back on this life and think “was that all I had to do?” I look forward to that day, when my eyes are opened again and I can see all of the parts and trials of life that were working to make me into a better person and I’ll realize how small they were in comparison to the big picture. But, I guess for now, I will think why me? and ponder on what I can do to help those around me.

Anybody else feel this way sometimes? How do you resolve these feelings?

-Mandy

 

One comment

  1. Stephie says:

    mandy! I think this all the time too. I love thinking about how life is just a refining of us as a rock… Sometimes we tumble and sometimes we get huge chunks taken out, but mostly, we just tumble along. I know you have trials now too, and sometimes it is easy for others to read this and think, that you don’t and how it’s not fair, but it’s your attitude. You have many blessings and you recognize it. Sometimes when life is going well I feel a little like I need to be ready to duck because a big trial must be coming! Haha. Love you! Wish I could have been at girls weekend!

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